Mama Monday : Janet from FashionAholic

I am literally giddy with excitement about Ms. Janet being here today.  I came across her via a comment that she left on another blog, visited then and have returned every day since. She has an amazing eye for fashion and has led me to many a great website for new and vintage finds. Janet is mama to two sweet babies and she also runs not one, but two, extremely successful businesses. And she's so modest about it. What an inspiration.

Meet Janet from Fashionaholic!

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Do you work outside the home or stay at home? What led you to either decision?

 I am both. I stay home with my kids Monday and Wednesday and work Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. I started my businesses a decade ago so that came before my children. Fortunately, it's a decision that was already made for me before having children so I'm happy to be able to juggle both.

Did you always see yourself as a stay at home/career woman? Was it a dream of yours?
Definitely a career woman. Having a family was not in my plans until I met my husband. I always worked and never thought that would ever be an issue. My dream was in fashion and blogging is as close as I get to achieving that dream.

What frustrates you most? What would you change if you could?
My frustrations are not being able to balance both efficiently. I'm always on the go and multi-tasking. It's hard to put everything you can into 5 important things in your life. Just not enough time in a day to accomplish my tasks and goals. If I could change something ti would be to be less ambitious in everything and focus on what's important, my family, to be less controlling and to learn to delegate better.

Any words of advice for mama's struggling with this decision?
Being a parent is hard enough and working also is harder, especially during the early stages. I say focus on whats important to you NOW. If you can be a stay at home mom then focus on that and make that your priority. Jobs come and go but your family does not. I wish I could stay home and raise my kids but it's a hard decision when you have your own business. Kids grow up fast and I want to be there as much as I can with them. 

ONE MORE THING TO INCLUDE!
Marriage and Kids. I noticed recently how much my husband and I disagree on topics concerning our kids and how difficult a marriage can become with kids involved. With that in mind, I would like to share my thoughts on this: 
1. Always be honest and talk things through no matter how bad. Kids understand your body language and can hear your pain when you argue. So be calm and don't involve the kids with your anger. Hard to do I know!  2. Never ever go to bed angry at one another. Not a great feeling waking up unhappy. 3. TRUST each other no matter what! 4. RESPECT each other 5. COMMUNICATE with a calm tone and present your frustrations and thoughts respectfully. No one wants to hear negative comments in a condescending way. 

The decision to work outside the home or stay home with your children is such a personal one. There is no right answer or right decision but rather, I truly feel each woman must do what is right for her and her family. I commend each and every mother out there for this. It is not easy. We are women and man, we're amazing.

Can I get a huge amen on Janet's thoughts on marriage? I think we can all agree that marriage before children and marriage after children is a whole different can of worms. Both great, but in different ways. It's all about priorities.

Thanks so much for your openness and honesty fabulous Janet!